How I've Learned to Exercise On My Own Terms As A Black Woman
Photo by Jennifer Enujiugha
Anti-fat beliefs in the Black Diaspora have a significant impact on how we approach exercise and define it for our bodies. It has a strong influence on how people approach exercise, policing how our bodies should exist. I've learned that the expectations for Black women's bodies are constantly changing through vast changes in my physique and developing physical conditions.
At times, the expectations we place on our bodies can be deemed unrealistic and harmful. I used to believe that adhering to such standards was critical in determining my worth, but that was before my body changed. When I reached my mid-20s and began to gain weight, it became a learning process for me to identify the features that I thought were avoidable.
Unlearning this was not an easy task, especially after developing a physical condition that had a significant impact on how I exercised. I started the unlearning process with anti-fatness by understanding that fat bodies or fat-related features should not be discriminated against. The human body is so diverse, and we all deserve to exist without regard for how our bodies are currently configured.
This required a lot of introspection and acknowledgment of the parts of my body that I avoid. I began by paying more attention to areas of my body where I was self-conscious, such as my thighs and waist. These were the main areas that had significant changes as a result of my weight gain. When I looked at my body, I began to accept it rather than bemoan it. This helped me unlearn how fitness was tailored to my body.
In the midst of adjusting to physical changes, I developed osteoarthritis as a result of strenuous working conditions. The majority of my diagnoses have been based on my weight rather than the work-related factors that contributed to them. As a result, I was advised to exercise not for physical therapy but for weight loss. The exercise was viewed as a punishment for existing in the body that I do, rather than a health-promoting measure. That's how it's commonly perceived for our bodies, right?
Exercise has been accompanied by anti-fat narratives that reinforce the belief that the only way to be deemed "worthy" is to lose weight. As a result of these experiences, I've learned to identify exercises that suit my body's needs rather than the projections of others. I've begun to identify exercises that alleviated the pain symptoms associated with my condition, as well as practices that improved my health. Stretches, breathing exercises, squats, oblique twists, crunches, and planks were all part of the workout. These exercises were prescribed by my orthopedic doctor and were designed to improve movement and circulation.
I started exercising on my terms and defined what those terms were. This meant separating from extremely strenuous exercise as well as the requirement to exercise every day. This was bolstered by what I'd learned about what it means to exist fully and proudly in my body through the words of Black authors and creatives. I've been clinging to Simi Muhumuza's words from one of her videos about accepting one's body as it is. In relation to Simi's words, I needed to allow my body to be my body and to deserve to exist in this body as it is now. This has inspired me to determine when it is appropriate to exercise and to be kinder to my body.
The societal pressures of constant exercise, extreme dietary processes, and the tendency to dislike my body ceased in ways they had not previously. Acceptance came after the stressors of conforming to a specific body type were removed. I had to tune out many of my body's critics and focus on what my body meant to me first. I saw the implications of what I was doing to my well-being after attempts at reduced eating and excessive exercise that were harmful to my body and realized that none of this was worth adhering to.
“I’ve learned that the expectations for Black women’s bodies are constantly changing through vast changes in my physique and developing physical conditions. ”
I will continue to fight societal pressures because remarks and stigmas do not end with the human body. Regardless of the good work done for my body, anti-fat beliefs will always be reinforced. I regularly face comments about weight gain or loss and have mustered the courage to speak out about the discomfort this causes. Even so, I affirm that how I feel about my body outweighs the harmful beliefs of others.
When I started exercising again, I reminded myself that I shouldn't exercise every day, but rather set aside days for such activities. It enabled me to recognize that focusing on centering exercise while ignoring my daily functions was unrealistic. I work most days, but I'm often tired or in pain from my physical condition. Despite these factors, how can I prioritize exercise? It wasn't fair of me to do so. For me, exercise means not assigning guilt or the essence of failure when I couldn't. I've learned to exercise in ways that aren't solely for weight loss by learning to accept my body as it is.
About the Writer
Princess Avianne Charles is a writer with articles on occupational safety and health, the humanities, and interpersonal relationships.
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